So You are Ready to Plan....

If I could pick just one word of advice it would be: communicate! This will be your most important tip. Every wedding, just like the marriage, has two partners. It is essential that you both have your desires fulfilled in the wedding. Start by making a list of each of your wedding wishes, organizing them from “must haves” to “great if we can afford it”. Begin the conversation between the bride and groom with a few questions:


How many guests do we want?
How much money do we have to spend?
What type of ceremony? Civil or Religious
Formal or informal?
Attendants? How many do we need?
Location?
Type of venue?
More questions may come to mind while you make your lists, but these suggestions will get you going. Then, think about your budget and how you will finance the wedding. Will you be covering all expenses yourself or will you be getting help from the family? Understand that once you accept financial help, you may have to give up some control. 


Okay, now you’ve made the major decisions and set your budget, you may want to consider the help of a professional wedding planner. This decision will put you in a more relaxed mode for your planning because you will have the guidance of a professional. The planner will take your vision and make suggestions that will work with your budget and specifications as listed above. The planner works with wedding vendors on a continuous basis and many will have the best vendors with special pricing because the vendor knows they will work with the planner again. So, you’ll not only have much less stress, hiring a wedding planner could actually help save some money!


If you decide not to use a planner, get ready to hold onto your vision. Ask for vendor recommendations from friends and family and then make your choice based on your budget and your style. Many times you can attend a bridal show locally and meet face to face with numerous vendors all in one spot. Once these choices are made, be ready to respond to unsolicited advice from well meaning friends and relatives. A good response to any advice could be, “Thank you for your suggestion. I’ll mention that to John.” Or “Interesting perspective. I’ll have to mention this to Jenna”. Use whatever words don’t make a lasting commitment to use their advice, while remaining friendly and mannerly to your loved ones. If you do this you will not get caught up in the free for all that sometimes happens when you are getting advice from lots of different people. 


Once you have your vendors, start considering who you want to be your attendants. This is not a decision you should make hastily, without thought or too long before the wedding date. Compile and review a list of duties you’d like each attendant to be responsible for and then fit the personality to the duties and their ability to complete them. Be sure to consult a wedding etiquette book or this website to make sure that the duties you’re expecting are legitimate expectations. No bridezillas! Too many times brides don’t consider these suggestions and it ends up affecting friendships. If your very best friend is irresponsible she may disappoint you if you ask her to be maid of honor. Be sure to discuss your needs/desires before she agrees. Also consider the financial responsibility that comes with the honor of being a member of the bridal party. Make sure all expenses are discussed.


Above all, find ways to relax and enjoy this time while you plan your wedding. It goes by in a blink of an eye. Don’t blind yourself with stress.


Now that you have all pieces of your intricate wedding puzzle at hand, begin fitting those pieces together to make your dream wedding a reality!